


Holding On and Letting Go

by justanoutlaw



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Adoption, Angst, Canon Compliant, Gen, Past Evil Queen | Regina Mills/Robin Hood, Post Season 6, Sort of happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-20
Updated: 2018-01-20
Packaged: 2019-03-07 09:19:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 718
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13431690
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justanoutlaw/pseuds/justanoutlaw
Summary: Regina went back for Roland after Fiona was defeated...but came back to Storybrooke alone.





	Holding On and Letting Go

**Author's Note:**

> My headcanon about why Roland was never seen again...

_It's everything you wanted_   
_It's everything you don't_   
_It's one door swinging open_   
_And one door swinging closed_   
_Some prayers find an answer_   
_Some prayers never know_   
_We're holding on and letting go-Ross Copperman_

 

Regina stepped through the portal, inhaling the sweet smell of the Sherwood Forest. It had taken her far too long to get there, but it was time.

 

Time to bring Roland home.

 

She had been angry with Zelena for sending him back without her getting to say goodbye, why couldn’t they have waited until she returned from New York? Yet, at the end of the day, she knew it was best. Especially considering what happened next. Her evil half and Hyde were tormenting the town, followed by the Black Fairy. It was too dangerous for the children that were already in Storybrooke, let alone for those who’d be dragged back.

 

But now, there was peace. The Black Fairy was killed, Gideon had been de-aged to an infant and life had calmed. She had talked to Henry about it, at length and he was all for it. He had always loved Roland, looked at him like a little brother. It was time for them to be a family.

 

It’s what Robin would’ve wanted.

 

It’s what _Regina_ wanted.

 

Oh how she missed that little boy with all her heart. Those little dimples that showed when he smiled, the way he smelled so sweetly of pine trees and ice cream. The way his cute voice rang out across the room. How he cuddled up with her during the Missing Year, during their time in Camelot.

 

Six months ago, she wasn’t ready to be Roland’s mother. Now, she was.

 

She made her way to the camp, looking around for a familiar face. John, she had to find John. She didn’t know how he would react to her, but at least she could try talking it out. She would visit with Roland, he could come to Storybrooke as well. With the help of Tiny, there were plenty of beans to go around.

 

Before she could ask someone for help, Regina heard that all too familiar voice, Spinning around, through the trees she could see him…Roland.

 

He had gotten bigger and clearly someone had been cutting his hair. A huge smile was across his face as he skipped through the woods. Regina’s heart soared and she wanted to run over, scoop him up and never let him go. That smile was Robin’s, those dimples matched them too.

 

And just as quickly as she felt her heart soar, it crashed into her ribs.

 

Two people came following behind Roland. She vaguely recognized them from the brief time the Merry Men had assisted her family. They were two women, two of the only women outside Mulan, actually. Regina knew that all of the Merry Men were in charge of Roland after Robin’s death, yet something seemed different about them.

 

“Mommy! Mama!” Roland’s voice rang out. “Come on! Uncle John said dinner will be ready soon!”

 

_Mommy. Mama._

 

Roland didn’t need a mother. He already had them. He had been adopted.

 

Tears welled up in her eyes and she had to remind herself, it was a good thing. He had a family, he was taken care of. It was what Robin would’ve wanted.

 

Even though his first choice would’ve been for him to be with her.

 

She couldn’t take him away from that, she couldn’t even let him see that she was there. It wasn’t fair to him or his new mothers. They were a family, they were clearly taking good care of him.

 

Regina watched as one of the women pick him up and cuddle him close. The other, poked his stomach and reached into her burlap sack, pulling out his plush monkey. The very same one she had given to him so long ago.

 

Would he even remember her

 

She didn’t know. What she did, was that he was happy and he was taken care of.

 

It was time to let go.

 

With tears in her eyes, Regina removed the second bean from her pocket and threw it towards the ground. A portal opened up and she took one last glance behind her. Roland and the women were gone. A deep breath escaped from her lips and she jumped inside.


End file.
